Reconciliation

My mum has eight children. We were rather poor and when my eldest sister was born, my mum was not able to take care of her. My grandmother who was my father's stepmother, adopted her. My mum was not allowed to visit my sister at all. So as she grew up, she regarded herself an orphan. But my aunties ie my father's stepsisters, were understanding and they tried to make our relationship worked.

However, she knew that she has 4 brothers and 3 sisters. I was in the same school as her. We did see each other quite often in school. As I grew older and I knew how to cycle, I would cycle to my grandmother's house to visit my sister.

One day, I talked to my sister about our parents. She was not happy as she was the only one not with the family. I told her to reconcile with my mum but she refused saying that my grandmother was the one that supported her through and not my mum.

I told her that she was lucky as she could go to university but not us as my parents couldn't afford it. Somehow, she was not eager to come back even after she was married.

But I kept in touch with her. She was posted to JB after her degree in USM. When I got married, I was rather busy with my life. So we hardly see each other. No matter what, we wrote to each other.

Until recently in 2005, my brother and I decided to visit my sister. At that time, my grandmother had already passed away. So my sister was not worried anymore. I brought along my mum. Initially, my mum was not eager but I insisted that she followed me there.

When my mum and my sister met after all these years, they were rather mutual. That started their connection. My sister started to call more often asking about my mum and even talked to her once in a while.

In 2006, she saw my mum again during my mum's birthday celebration.

Recently, I made a trip to JB and this time, my mum willingly tagged along. When we reached her house, I was surprised that both my mum and sister were in the room for quite some time. When they came out, we had a group photo taken.

my sis and my mum

Here I took a close shot of both my mum and my sister. Guess this was the first time they felt they were close to each other.

When we reached the hotel, I asked my mum what happened in the room. She related her story:


Mum: "It wasn't that I didn't want you. After you, I gave birth to your brother and your sister. I couldn't take care of so many of you. Since Ah Mah wanted you, I gave you to her."

Sis: "Well, it happened long ago. Let's not talk about it anymore."


Guess my sister knew about that long ago but it's just that she needed to hear from my mum herself.

My mum felt so relief as finally she had the strength to speak out and thus that heavy burden she had been carrying was lifted off.

I was so glad that this trip was a success.. I am happy for both my mum and my sister.